Yo. Ho. Ho.

First of all, they have to change the name.

Plantar’s Wart.

Whoever named it got it wrong. You see, I have a Plantar’s Wart, and I do solemnly swear, I am NOT a Planter. Of anything. I inherited my Mother’s Green Thumb which consisted of plastic household flowers, and a rocky dirt bed surrounded by bricks in our frontscape. She did not care for the planting of plants. Period.

Please excuse the allusion, but the apple does not fall far from the tree.

Back to my doggone wart.

As determined, I did not get this while planting. So where do they come from? Wouldn’t you know. In fact, an acronym is the cause. While we are on acronyms, they may be the cause for just about all troubles in this world, anymore. Nonetheless. My wart.

It came from HPV. It seems my Plantar wart was caused by an infection with HPV in the outer layer of skin. Right on the sole of my foot. The left foot to be exact. How did the HPV get there? Well, that little virus entered my body through some sort of tiny cut, or break, or another undisclosed weak spot. On the bottom of my kicker. Apparently, this HPV is very common. There are more than 100 kinds of this virus. But only a few of them cause warts on the feet.

Now my million dollar question. What is HPV? Human papillomavirus. It is also a sexually transmitted virus. I can assure you; this is not the case with me. Especially on the bottoms of my feet.

I know, I know. We crossed new lines. So. If all of this is too much information, there is another more wholesome blog out there somewhere. ( https://www.wikihow.com/Find-Blogs )

The long and short of things. I forgot to mention this Wart Crisis to my doctor at a recent physical. So I bought a do-it-yourself Freeze-the-Wart Kit. It reminded me of the classic movie scenes, where the villain pulls out the torture kit, and they prepare all of the diabolical tools, one by one, right in front of the victim. I was both Dr. Evil, and Austin Powers, all in one.

Finally, I got around to the procedure. The Big Freeze. I never dreamed it would hurt. Like the Devil. The word “freeze” seems like such an insignificant and benign word. But the act of freezing a Planter’s Wart is anything but that.

I don’t wish to complain any further. The reason I brought all of this up, is because I have this little place on my foot, and I noticed. It is making me notice so much, that now I am walking with a slight limp. Like Long John Silver. On Treasure Island.

But here is what I know about this. Sometimes, when the good is all good, we don’t take the time to say, “Hey. Wow. Thanks for all this good.”

But. When the good goes bad, we notice. And we miss the All-Good. Like looking for that lost treasure. On that island. As we limp.


“Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well.”
― Robert Louis Stevenson


“To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the only end of life.”
― Robert Louis Stevenson, Familiar Studies of Men and Books


“Make the most of the best and the least of the worst.”
― Robert Louis Stevenson