Ties. Dresses.

Where does time go?

Today, is my brother Jerry, and sister-in-law Betty’s 43rd Anniversary. Forty-three years together. How does the tick, go tock, so many times?

Those two started out so young. They have been together, down the long road, ever since. I was about 11-years-old when they got married. I sort of remember the actual day. Some parts. I had to wear a horrible polyester dress, salmon colored, that my mom made. It had a huge white collar. I complimented the outfit with some white clunky shoes too. At 11, my keen fashion sense what on high alert. I pressed on. I took one for the team that day. However, this isn’t about me. No.

Yet. I sure do remember the time leading up to the wedding. Surely enough, they loved each other. So much, in fact, they got a little busy right off the bat. Young Jason, my nephew, was quickly on the way. So, they decided to get married, just to seal the deal. I think they threw their hands up in the air, and then around one another.

But then. The mystery of it all ensued. I knew something was up. There was a big family secret. So big, in fact, that everyone knew except for me. I guess they thought an 11-year-old simply wouldn’t notice the transpiring of events. One day, I’d be like, “Oh, hey. Where’d the kid come from?”

Yeah. The big secret. We were down our basement playing ping pong one night, the all of us. I can remember this like yesterday. I was sitting a game out, and I asked what the big mystery was. Everyone’s eyes got wide, especially my Mom. They said, “If you can guess, we will tell you if you are right.”

So I opted for the 20 Questions Approach. First question: “Is it bigger than a bread box?” And my brother Ed said, “Not yet.” The room erupted with laughter. I got pissed off and went upstairs.

Oh, they say the youngest kids have it made. I say, we had our challenges. We were always the last to know. And too short to go on the good rides at Kings Island. But that isn’t my point.

Time. This morning I was texting the two oldie-weds, that married couple, and you could “hear” their happiness right through the text message. They said they were “as happy as can be” and “so lucky.” And on. It was truly sweet.

When they first go married, I remember overhearing a couple of ladies talking after church at the Koffee Klatch. The gist? “Oh, they will be divorced in a year.” My friends gave me the word on that too. “My mom and dad says Jerry and Betty will never make it.”

As it turned out, they are doing okay, so far. We’ll see how it goes from here.

They’ve had their fair share of capers and hijinks, but they always seem to come through with winning colors. Laughing about things, and telling the stories. They both have great individual qualities which really compliment one another. They go with the flow. They roll with the punches. Two peas in a pod, I suppose. Or two needles in a haystack, maybe.

Time. We all march through it. But how we march, is the key.

I could take a lesson from the two of them.

Smile often and laugh more.
Be kind to one another, and everyone else.
Cook excellent cabbage rolls and mashed potatoes. (That was a hint for my sister-in-law, in case she would ever read this. Which she won’t. But I am an optimist.)
And, no matter where the road takes you, sometimes you need to let go of the map, and surrender to the possibilities. Or pull over and ask for directions, whichever comes first.


“To be fully seen by somebody, then, and be loved anyhow – this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.”
― Elizabeth Gilbert


“A friend is one to whom one may pour out the contents of one’s heart, chaff and grain together, knowing that gentle hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away.”
― George Eliot


“It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important.”
― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince