Who fired the shot, and why do giraffes always get to play center?

Do you think Lee Harvey Oswald did it? The whole thing, on his own, without any help from anyone? I just saw his mugshot. He didn’t look like the smartest fellow. He may have been one sandwich short of the whole picnic lunch, in my estimation. Regardless, today is his birthday. Born on this date in 1939, and killed on Novemeber 24, 1963 by Jack Ruby.

I suppose I am a conspiracy theorist by nature. Albeit, I don’t seek them out, or linger around on conspiracy-theory-websites. But when certain things happen — most things really — my brain flips into “questioning” mode.
How does that thing work?
Is that really how that thing happened?
Is there a better way to do this?
What is the reason behind this?

And on, and on. It doesn’t matter if someone is showing me the brand new technology of a laser-light can opener, or if I’m hearing about a specific event, such as the president selling out the United States for his own personal profit.

I ask questions until I find answers. I suppose I don’t like to be “spoon fed” anything.

Sometimes, that is how it runs with things here, on this “unblog.” Often, I like to post little facts and tidbits. But normally, I question the source until I’m satisfied that it is true.
Like, “The sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick” is said to be the toughest tongue twister in English. I’m not sure who is given the ultimate power in handing out this distinction. Yet. I’ve tried to say this out loud (in my office this morning, with the dogs watching). It’s pretty difficult to spit out, and I tend to agree with the King of Castle TongueTwist.

The world is full of information. I say this all the time, I know. Yet. Sometimes, I make “assumptions” when I should be questioning, instead. For example, I’ve read many times on the internet that elephants can’t jump. Well, I assumed they were the only ones, since they seem to keep popping up in the web factoid culture. But, I just found out that sloths, hippos, and rhinos — along with elephants — can’t jump either, when it comes to the world of mammals.

Why is this important? Well, if you are ever pulling up sides at the zoo for a good game of basketball, and you are the picking-captain for your team, you’ll know NOT to choose the elephants, rhinos, hippos, OR — god forbid — those cute little sloths, for your team. Go with the monkeys and giraffes. You’ll win every time.

Yes, conspiracy theories start when there are gaps in the story. Glitches, blips. We’ve been streaming the old episodes of Columbo, with Peter Falk, for our evening television viewing. He’s an asker of questions, that is for sure. A conspiracy theorist extraordinaire. But typically, what comes on the other end of a question — eventually — is an answer.

I think it is important to ask. To seek.

Also, this morning, as I was getting ready to fix my breakfast, I thanked the poultry gods, right out loud, for all the good chickens in the land. Then I began to wonder just how many chickens that might be. The “factoid” that first came up said, “There are more chickens in America than people on the planet.” To which, I said, “That cannot possibly be true.”

Well, it isn’t. There are roughly 391.3 million American Chickens in residence. And of course, this Planet Earth has 7.53 billion people, standing around on the face of the ball. An extremely large difference between the two.

So there it is, once again. The thing I say so frequently. This life of ours, this world, is filled with information, facts, and figures. Swirling. Whirling. Jumping and thumping. For us to know, learn, understand, and perhaps most of all, question. Just remember, “Those are not my monkeys, and that is not my basketball team.”


“Everyone loves a conspiracy.”
― Dan Brown, The Da Vinci Code


“Every solution to every problem is simple. It’s the distance between the two where the mystery lies.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant


“The world, even the smallest parts of it, is filled with things you don’t know.”
― Sherman Alexie, The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian