Whether a Weather Balloon?

Some people believe the earth is flat.
I am not one of them. I have read the scientific proof which has indicated otherwise. Besides that, I’ve seen the round shadow the earth makes on the moon, and I’ve flown in an airplane for several hours where we didn’t suddenly “drop off” a flat surface, and had to swoop underneath the other side to continue.

Yes, conspiracy theories are rampant. Some are believable, and others are…. well…. completely idiotic. But the truth of the whole deal is, I LOVE a conspiracy theory. I like to be challenged to think in new directions. (As a sidebar, I am funny that way. In some things, I am completely trusting. Even gullible. But at other times, I can be a pretty tough customer when it comes to the nuts and bolts of something.)


A couple of days ago, an anniversary of sorts, occurred. In 1997,
the U.S. Air Force released a report which dismissed the claims of an alien spacecraft crash in Roswell, New Mexico. It was no little thing. In fact, the report was 231 pages long. And they released it almost exactly 50 years AFTER than the “alleged” event.

Now this one, makes me ask some questions.

The whole Roswell thing has sort of gotten a “kooky” rap. But its origins are anything but. Here was a guy, named W.W. Brazel. He was a ranch foreman down in Roswell, in July of 1947. I’ve never met anyone named W.W. So I am thinking people called him Billy, or Will. Just a guess. Anyway. One day, Billy, or Will, is out walking his land, and he starts to find this strange looking shiny material scattered all over the place. Like, fairly big pieces of this stuff. And Billy thought it so odd, that he turned it into the sheriff. The sheriff thought so too, and he turns it over to the Air Force Base down there. So now the wholesome Air Force guys have it, and what do they do? They release a statement on July 8th, which announced that they have “recovered” the wreckage of a “flying disk.”

Well. Not much else happened in Roswell in 1947. At all. So the big-shiny-metal-finding incident was pretty huge. As such, the local newspaper, put the story right on the front page in nice bold letters. Can you say viral? The story launched Roswell into the spotlight, encouraging public curiosity, and a newborn taste for UFO speculation.

And now I will speculate. Someone at the Pentagon, probably General Huffenpuff, said, “This cannot be!” Yep. That Air Force soon took back their story, however, saying the debris had been merely a downed weather balloon.

Eventually, the Roswell Incident” faded until the late 1970s. That is when claims surfaced that the military had invented the weather balloon story as a cover-up. To add to the fervor, those believers argued that officials had in fact retrieved several alien bodies from the crashed spacecraft. Funky Green Men. And they were now stored in the mysterious Area 51 installation in Nevada.

You know the rest.

I just wonder what the real story might be. There isn’t any substantial proof, either way. However, I am inclined to think that we may not be alone in this Universe. My thought on we humans is this: We are pretty thick. Dense. Dull. Vapid. We used to have enough resources on this Planet for all people. But we blew it. And, the greed which outweighs the intellect in this matter, continues to destroy this planet Earth. Round Earth. Rather quickly.

My next supposition, is that we Humans, and our Earth, are some kind of a betting pool. Like this. All the other civilizations out there have a pool going, and the “Date” of “Earth’s Self-Destruction” is the focus of the bet. Kind of like when everyone here bets on March Madness, or the Super Bowl.

Those “Aliens” have brackets and everything. Every so often, they have parties, and watch. Wear team colors. They make big bowls of Nacho Cheese Dip, and Party Pizza Squares, and such.

And the Roswell Incident? That little crash was for us. Something to add to their party antics. Those weren’t the real Aliens. Those were just like their version Sea Monkeys or something, they sent down for a laugh.

For a laugh.

Every day I am reminded: It sure is Funny Universe we are in.


“It’s hard to enjoy practical jokes when your whole life feels like one.”
― Rick Riordan, The Last Olympian


“Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke.”
― Joss Whedon


“In eternity there is no time, only an instant long enough for a joke.”
― Hermann Hesse, Steppenwolf