One day, a sunny sort of day, there were two grapes. Hanging on a vine, in a vineyard. In Italy.
No. Let’s make it New York. So that I don’t have to type in Italian. So.
The two grapes are hanging in a vineyard in Upstate New York. Specifically, Brotherhood Winery. Which is recognized as the oldest operating winery in the United States. They have been producing wine for nearly 200 years.
If it is exactly 200 years, that makes their Grand Opening falling around 1818. Now that’s kind of cool. Wine. Since 1818. But, like, probably none of the early heroes of our country were there. By 1818, George Washington and Benjamin Franklin were already dead. Maybe John Adams and Tom Jefferson were able to hobble over to the Vineyard. Although, I am not sure they were wind drinkers. And they would have been creaking-old. Regardless.
And speaking of the place where they grow the wine. Why is Vineyard pronounced that way? Why not just say Vine Yard? Or spell it Vinyard?
I get side tracked.
Back to the two dang grapes. In modern times. Last Tuesday, let’s say. Although, I don’t know the first thing about growing wine, or even when the grapes should be hanging on the vine. It seems like Spring would be a much better bet. This time of year is probably too cold.
Dang it already. Okay. Let’s run with this:
Two grapes are hanging on a freaking vine in New York. Stinking Upstate New York. At the stupid Brotherhood Winery. It is Spring. Nobody is around, not even the Ghost of Dolly Madison. It was sunny a few minutes ago, but I would say the sky, and my mood, have clouded over. Significantly.
The one grape leans over to the other and says, “I heard Jack fell off the vine the other day. He got hurt real bad. But all he did was let out a little whine.”
A little whine.
The other grape turns to the first and replies, “You just can’t trust the gossip you hear on the grapevine.”
“Yeah. But. I also heard Carol’s youngest grape held up a convenience store. That’s the problem with those kid grapes these days. Parents are not raisin ‘em right.”
Yeah. So the two of them stayed there, hanging out, chatting it up for several weeks. Then one day, they both dropped off, plumping down to the dirt below. Soon they began to shrivel, shrivel, shrivel. Raisins.
The raisins finally looked at each other and said. “This is it. We will never achieve grapeness.”
The one rolled away. The other stayed.
A raisin in the sun.
So there you have it. All of that trouble for a few lame and measly jokes.
The glass half full, or half empty. Or not even close with only two dried up raisins, waiting for that Lady from the Sun-Maid box to come along.
Today? Just try to hang in there. Or drink, from the Elixirs of Life.
“Instructions for living a life.
Tell about it.”
― Mary Oliver
If you can’t change it,
change the way you think about it.”
― Maya Angelou
“Be a lamp, or a lifeboat, or a ladder. Help someone’s soul heal. Walk out of your house like a shepherd.”