Spin Cycle

We bought a new dishwasher. Appliances. Devices designed to perform a specific task, typically a domestic one. That’s what they are, that’s what they do.

I can remember when I was a kid, and I would be dropping in on adult conversations, sitting under the kitchen table, holding my breath. One line that stands out in my memory, as Dad, and Uncle Charlie, or Grandpa would be sitting around. “They don’t make ‘em like they used to.”

As years past, and I became a young adult, who knew everything about the inner-workings of the world, I would hear the same thing. But I had an inner response then. I would say inside my head, “Oh you oldies. Of course they don’t make things like they used to. They make them BETTER. It is called progress. Evolution of design.” Me, of youthful bliss.

After 54 years, now, I realize that the world is filled with people. Many know things way better than I do. And others do not. The trick is to navigate. Regardless, Mary & I built this house in 1996. That is some 23 years ago. We had lived in Eaton for about 7 years prior, and decided we need a built-to-last home in the country. So we called some people with hammers, and such. Build, we did.

And, for almost 18 to 20 years, everything lasted pretty well. But then the whole list of candidates started to peter out. The washer, the dryer, water heater, oven, microwave, stove, the roof, and on, and on. Kaput. Sputter. Splat.

But 18 or 20 years was a pretty good run for these things. I thought. I think.

Here is what I am observing these days, as a 54-year-old. Now, after “The Replacements” have made their way in, they last for about 2 or 3 years, and then they start breaking down. This dishwasher, the one I mentioned that we just bought, it is a replacement for the replacement.

And buying a major appliance should not be as hard as it is these days. Researching the purchase is as easy as pie. After reading a Consumer Reports review online, and checking user comments on two or three sellers’ sites. You get the swing of the 5-Star-Rating pretty quickly.

But the actual delivery of the device, after you’ve paid your good money reminds me vaguely of selling your oldest born child into slavery.

Then, then, THEN is the problem of the installation. Also, another thing that the Appliance Czars dangle in your face, like a carrot before the donkey’s nose.

The happy ending is this. The dishwasher was finally installed yesterday, on January 22. It broke on December 30. And don’t worry, we don’t have dirty dishes stacked from floor to ceiling. No.

Thankfully, I was using my very good 54-year-old brain and threw them in the Clothes Washing Machine. The spin cycle was terrible on the Fine China. But we take our losses on the chin. And of course, now, that machine is acting up.


“I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.”
― Jerome K. Jerome


“I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.”
― Charles Lamb


“In the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you.”
― Leo Tolstoy