Aaahhhhchooo. Or Flush.

The Day I Killed Satellite.

Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think? I am toying with this, as the title for my newest book, a memoir.

“The Day I Killed Satellite.” A Memoir by Polly Kronenberger

The other top runners are:

“I’ve Sneezed In Empty Rooms, And Said, ‘Excuse Me.’”

“I Should Have Stayed Home And Cleaned The Toilets.”

Yeah. All three are true now. But I am happiest, and most proud of the first. It happened this past week. We have been living out here in the middle of somewhere, for nearly 23 years. And when we built this house, we made a place for a nice gray satellite dish. Since that time, we have enjoyed thousands upon thousands of shows which have literally fallen from the sky. And we received them with open arms, and a willing dish.

On Thursday, it all ended.

We’ve paid a lot for satellite over the years. Here recently, our Direct TV bill was astronomical. A couple of summers ago we cut back on channels. Well, we had a pool party or some such thing, shortly thereafter. And. We didn’t have the channel that the Reds were playing on that day. After Boos came from the crowd, Mary proclaimed, “WE, from this day forward, will never be without ALL the channels again.” And then she did a little spinny-round dance. Margaritas and all. BUT. I knew for me, that would mean a call to Direct TV the following Monday.

Since that time, we have been paying for the Grand Smorgasbord. Granted, no one is ever here to watch all those shows, and that is okay by Introvert-Me. But after a couple of years of paying hundreds of monthly dollars for 2 channels — the ones we actually watched — I approached her with the proposal to quit.

So now we have an HD antenna on our roof, and internet access to stream. And we are happy as the Clam in Spongebob Square Pants. Between Sling TV and our local channels, we see what we need to see.

On a need to know basis.

Which brings me to our secret lives as CIA Agents. Which I can’t talk about here. But that might be the new book title,

“I’m Not Frowning. It Is Just My Face.”


“Unbeing dead isn’t being alive.”
― E.E. Cummings


“Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect.”
― Margaret Mitchell


“I go to seek a Great Perhaps.”
― François Rabelais