Just Add Milk

Keep reading.  There are two of you reading this at the same time. Exactly.  You see…

The Laws of Physics affect our lives daily, whether we realize it or not.  They rule the Universe.  Quantum Physics challenge the time / space continuum as we know it, and many viable theories have been presented.

One of the most widely know, is the theory of Parallel Realities.  There are traces of proof… ALL around us.  Take for instance, the evidence which is  revealed in the common breakfast cereals we eat each day.  Secret messages?  You be the judge.

I’ll break them down.  One by one.

Shredded Wheat.  Not all grains work out.  But this cereal can be seen in the gym, day or night, pumping the Iron.  That’s right folks. It is shredded.

Frosted Flakes.  These are old women who used to be blondes, and are now beyond gray.  Blonde in a bottle.  Things happen to them. Still.  Like…. A brunette was driving in a car with a blonde. The brunette told the blondie…. “Stick your head out the window and see if the blinker works.”   She stuck her head out and said, “Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes…”

Fruity Pebbles.  Also known as Gay Rock Stars.  Little Gay Rock Stars.

Honey Comb.  When your Sweetie’s Hair is a total mess.  “Honey.  Comb your hair.”

Cheerios.  Always a happy goodbye.  From England.

Chex.  The Chronic List Maker.  Yes.  Like Santa.  Making a list, and checking it twice.

Kix.  Destined to be a Rockette.  Or an NFL Punter.  Depending.

Apple Jacks.  A new exercise fad.  Jump up and down. Flap your arms & legs.  Balance on Apples while you do this.  Apple Jacks.

Wheaties.  No analogy here. Wheaties have no parallel existence.  They are Wheaties, no matter where you travel in the Universe.

Lucky Charms.  Irish Lucky & Charming?  Oh. Liam Neeson.

Golden Grahams.  The highest priced messages, sent via the telegram.

Nut’n’Honey.  When you say something, and your wife doesn’t hear you.  So then she says…”What?”  And you say… “Nothin’ Honey.”

Product 19.  Think Nevada. Area 51. Little else is known.

Trix.  Prostitution, at its best.  Those old hookers united… and they have this cereal to prove it.   Magicians have protested worldwide.  They want to claim the name.

Special K.  If your last name begins with a K… and if you are Special.  You are awarded the grandest title.  Special K.

Rice Krispies.  This is quite possibly the most dubious of all the cereals.  Widely associated with the profile of  anyone who suddenly snaps or pops… the pathological serial killer.   Most recently however, they are a vital addition to  Trump’s Super-Secret-Investigative Team.  Named for the noises a Wire Tap make… Snap, Crackle, and Pop are the right-hand men on the squad.  And, they are small enough to actually fit into phones to see if they are tapped.

Life.  Yep.  There you have it.

The Parallel Reality of the Universe.  Explained in the simplest terms.

You just need to think outside the box.

 

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“It’s enough for me to be sure that you and I exist at this moment.”
― Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude

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“Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

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“A Man Said to the Universe

A man said to the universe:
“Sir, I exist!”
“However,” replied the universe,
“The fact has not created in me
A sense of obligation.”
― Stephen Crane, War Is Kind and Other Poems

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